Well first of all; when a person dies; it’s the responsibility of the family to bring the body home (if they didn’t die at home.) Typically you have to put makeup on the body and wheel them out in a wheelchair; it has to appear as if they are alive otherwise; there is a fine.
Once at home, you dress the body (there is no embalming of the body) and place them in a casket. For the next 24 to 40 hours, you have visitation at home. (This continues through the night.) The body can’t be left alone; someone or several people must accompany all hours. Friends and family come to pay their last respects. It is the responsibility of the house where the funeral is to feed everybody who shows up (friends and family help with the preparation of the food.) It may include 3 meals a day for 2 days. They have somber/sad music playing (loud) the whole day, sometimes live musicians. Some people go home to sleep; some stay all night.
The following day visitation starts again early morning. Breakfast and lunch are served. After lunch, the casket is opened for the family to say one last goodbye. The casket is then carried on the shoulders to the cemetery. Family and then friends follow. The flowers will be carried to be placed around the tomb. At the cemetery, there is a small prayer service and the casket is slid into the tomb (above ground.) Some of the person’s favorite things are placed in the tomb with them. The tomb is then bricked up while everyone watches. Everyone walked back to the house and are serviced a snack. Family is served supper again.
The following day; a trip to the river (this is primarily family and godparents. They literally wash all the clothes and bedding from the house in the river to get rid of the death germ. This is the job of the women. The immediate family does not help. They are also a symbolic washing of the immediate family (household.) (This is done with an herb and rose pedals. This is to get rid of the sadness. The rose pedals and herbs are then thrown in the river to be washed away; past the laundering area. There is also incense to purify the area and the buckets of dirty laundry. After the clothes are washed and laid in the grass to dry. They are put back in the buckets and we leave and go back to the home and are served lunch.
Several months ago, I followed a procession for more than a mile and decided to turn around before I got lost. Occasionally, the casket is placed on sawhorses for the pall bearers to rest. You may also expect vendors of ice cream outside the house or selling among the procession. The people dress very casually; black is not the primary color. Candles are burning and will continue for at least 2 weeks and probably longer. We are learning and experiencing some of their cultures and customs. It seems that each day we have a new experience or an unanswered question; this time is very enlightening for us.
Dennis and Sue
