EXCESS AND INSUFFCIENT

A good friend “Judy” asked for another blog.  I replied we will be home in 2 months; it takes a month to write one evidently I underestimated myself because it has taken nearly 2 months  (sometimes the creative ideas are dull.)  I think that “I don’t have sufficient time.”  See I told you this is pretty dull already.

Speaking of dull, maybe I will; describe the sharpening process of a knife - - - that’s it; there isn’t one except to rub it on the cement.  Except for one man I know whose 21 inch machete is always sharper than my pocket knife.  Let me further explain that I know when to sharpen my buck by the bald spot on my arm, when the hair grows back.

I asked the landlord if he would build a covering from the house to the bathroom and pila (sink) about a 10’ X 15’ corrugated tin patio.  That was in October, finally in April; we agreed he will buy the material and I will do the work.  I did some calculation s and put an X on the driveway / parking area.  Busted through the concrete, dug a hole and put in the tree.  The roots and branches were removed.  The rest went uneventful (Thanks Guy) until nailing the last section of roof, now I have no place to lean my ladder.  See picture.  Finally cementing in the tree.  He would do this himself, and did using about a quart of cement.  I thought a bit insufficient but I stay dry.

Apparently the flies are hoping to stay dry also.  I know that some of you will not have any sympany for me because you have to live among the sasquask Mosquito or sabor tooth black fly.  Well, this is my story so I get to do all of the whining for now.  I kill about 50 a day inside the house.  Occasionally I spray in the bathroom and later sweep up 200.  To entertain myself one day I decided not to swat them unless I could get a minimum of 3.  I don’t know what they do but my toothbrush tastes funny.  We have an excessive amount of flies; see picture.

Now that I mention excess; it reminds me a time we used a small town hotel recently.  It cost $7.00 including a private bathroom and secure parking (that is not excess, just in case you were getting ahead of the story.  The excessive part was 2 beds to choose from.  Sue getting there before me, because I was parking the car, tested the beds.  Upon arrival she suggested that we move a mattress to another bed to get a bit softer sleep.  Upon examination we found the mattress and box spring to be one unit.  After further examination we also found the box spring was really only the box and no springs were involved; the other wasn’t really a box but more like a crate with slats.  The mattress on the crate was a bit softer but we opted for the more even box feel.  Just a few words about the mattress are to compare the comfort of adding a page of newspaper or the entire paper before sitting on a rock.  So I guess this is actually about insufficient.

Oh yes, about the private bathroom; first there was no light in the bathroom; no toilet seat on the toilet so be careful sitting down.  The shower was another story, the water was so hot and there was no way to make it cooler.  Dennis scalded his feet. What an adventure!  If I were brave enough; I could have steamed cleaned between my toes / a bit excessive.

If you are typical you have a credit card or 2 and if you have a better than typical credit rating you interest rate maybe below 19%.  A little side note, a few years back 1980, we decided to enjoy a little extra for Christmas.  We found it quite easy to get a credit card, our first credit card.  We also found it quite easy to buy things.  We did not have to trim the bottom branches off the tree in order to fit all the gifts under it.  We just packed them around it.  Anyway, Christmas was filled with joy…the kind you buy.  January through December the next year; we learned the negative side of excessive.  It’s a good thing we had (very typical) a $250.00 limit.  This entire boring story is to prime you for the excessive prime interest rate on a credit card here; it is 46 1/2%.  Ouch I think that is a lot more than excessive.

For a moment I will look at insufficiencies.  Guatemala does have free or low cost national healthcare.  However most diagnostics are either Agrippa (a cold) or gastritis (stomach problems) either is cured by injections typically 3 to 8 shots.

Another possible cure in case you are afraid of needles is to burn a red or green candle and pray.  If you have a phobia of fire and needles you next choice maybe to visit Maximon.  By the way; this is not the name of a renowned medical clinic as Mayo or a specially trained doctor.  Living here is more than interesting to see how the Catholic churches as messed with the indigenous beliefs.

Also interesting here is the increase in others including evangelistic.  Apparently God lost His hearing because all churches have more speakers than used at Woodstock including additional blow horns mounted on the roof or higher.  Yes, I am a Christian because of God’s grace only and I do believe that the message of God’s love and grace should be spread but turn the volume down.  Another is if you sing as bad or worse than I, do not hold the microphone.  Until recently I thought tones only dealt with the intensity of a color and keys were to unlock.  Maybe take a lesson from someone who has talents ranging between Johnny Cash and Tiny Tim.

I think I will just ramble for a while or as explained let creativity create itself and you decide if it is insufficient or excessive.

Speed bump (Tumeloes) Avenue – 38 bumps in 3 miles, although in this route there is not a spot that your front tires are hitting a new bump before your back tires have crossed the previous one.  There is a spot like this in Zaragoza.   But not 38 times.  In some places there are speed bumps on dirt roads that are so eroded from rain that you must travel at less than 10 MPH.

18 different posters on 1 telephone pole advertising who to vote for.  If I recall last election, there were 28 choices on the ballot.

I counted the obvious dents and scratches on motorcycles once as Sue did her grocery shopping 26 out of 28.

Driving into Guatemala City (Guate) the traffic was a bit heavy.  We did the crawl before getting to the city; walkers were faster than us and that was 28K about 17 miles.

Teenage girls from the ages of 12 to 20 make tortillas at the rate of more than 1 a minute (less than that and you are fired.)  Most make 2 a minute and get paid Q10.00 ($1.25) for 3 hours of work.  The 13 to 15 year olds interviewed give the money to the family.

Hoeing your 1 acre plot of land to prepare for planting in 2 days.

13 people (2 were children) in my Mazda MPV van.

Of vehicles that passed as I waited near the market; 5/8 were buses.  Of non buses; ½ were Toyota pickups.

2 ½ tons of corn (dried kernel only) may be enough for a family of 5 for the year to make tortillas.

A string of firecrackers the length of a soccer field.

My neighbor tinkering with his car so it will start more than 8 months; still not a permanent fix.

Rebuilding a road or bridge after a washout the same way.

“Tigo blue” you have to have been here to understand this one.

A new release movie on DVD for Q10.00 ($1.25) or in El Salvador $1.00.

Saying Hola; Buenos Dias or Adios to EVERY by passer on the street.

The thickest steak to have eaten is ¼ inch and sometimes you wish it were thinner because it is too tough to chew.

A hamburger so thin that if you were in the rain with the top of the bun removed the bottom bun gets wet before the hamburger.

Walking in the rain with water nearly to your knees and thinking that your umbrella will keep you dry.

Sue telling me I was right and she was wrong twice this year.

Opening a 6 pack of toilet paper and wondering if you will have enough for the weekend.

Expecting the piece of plywood to be cut straight and square within ¼ inch.

Eating at McDonalds twice in 3 years.

Taking 8 weeks to write this blog.

The next part was written by Sue:

It has been an exciting 3 years.  We are winding down with less than 2 weeks.  When we moved to Guatemala in 2008, we were concerned about the dangers, having electricity, how our limited Spanish would do.

We have learned a few things:

We don’t go where the danger is.

We have learned to ignore the noise from trucks, buses, political announcements from speakers on top of or in the back of cars, trucks, or vans.  Music (that’s what they call it) from speakers outside of churches.

We have also learned that the rainy season is too long.  From May until October, we get rain daily, sometimes only in the afternoon and night but sometimes the entire day.

Our Spanish is better but still needs lots of work.

We do have electricity most of the time, during the rainy season; we lose it about once a month.

We have also learned how to drive at night.  We just don’t do it.  It is very dangerous because many cars, trucks, buses, and motorcycles have NO taillights, headlights, or any other kind.  There are always people walking or on bicycles again with no lights. 

I planned to have another section indicating the generosity of yourselves and the accomplishments that you helped with; for now it’s a generous Muchas Gracias.  Tu eres muy amaile.  I will be fishing August and if we have a rainy day; I will finish this part while sitting in my tent.

Dennis and Sue

A special thank you to our blog master Gabor Bach who has posted all of our blogs for us.